You will hear a lot of successful people both in business and in life say it's all about surrounding yourself with the right people. I can definitely see the angle they are coming from, the people y0u are surrounding yourself with or gaining input from can shape the path you are on both positively or negatively, so are you hanging with the right crew?
In my personal experience there are a few types of people I gravitate towards and others I try to shy from. I think being conscious of where you are and where you want to be has a huge impact on these choices and how you surround yourself for success.
Here are the people that I have found to be so priceless for any journey I take in life.
1. the dreamer! Oh the dreamer, this is me hahaha, I am to the core a dreamer of the greatest visions, no hesitations, full commitment, no limitations, you can do it as long as you have a plan. These people are your biggest cheerleaders, they will help you let loose to achieve your wildest visions in life and help you discover your life passions. Who doesn't want someone in their corner like this? And as a dreamer I love to have other dreamers to help me nail down the projects, visions and goals I have in life, it truly is a magical meet up when you can do this with someone you enjoy.
2. the encourager! Someone who is unbiased and only wants the best for you regardless if they see your dream or not, they are there to encourage you on. This is golden and sometimes exactly what you need, they can help you figure things out, talk things through with an insight that can be so helpful because they aren't necessarily blinded by the dream.
3. the do'er! This is your muscle, they love to help and get things done. They will probably share in a passion you have and they love to help you get a vision to come to life. These folks don't sit around twiddling their fingers they are eager to get in and get things done to get you closer to your goal.
4. the seasoned! This is who you learn from. These folks will have already walked the walk many time over and are more than happy to help you avoid and pitfalls they have stumbled in along the way. They will be someone you strive to be, so make sure they are doing the thing you want to do in a way you strive to do it.
ok this is your crew of victory now we need to look at who you should consider shying away fr0m.
1. the bubble burster! Not to be confused with the logical thinker who is someone who is only bringing up potential road blocks to get you to start thinking ahead. A bubble burster usually has some ill intent that stems around them not succeeding in life, and wishing they had. You will notice these people are more focused on themselves and usually they point out the hurtles in you vision but without a solution, or even an offer to help you find one.
2. the limiter! These folks are limited by their own selves, they are not eager to move forward and excel they try and push limitations on you so be carful. They can be hard to spot at first but once you do, oh you know. You will notice they may have big dreams but something always gets in the way and they refrain from personal growth to push past the hard times.
3. debbie downers! Oh poor me, usually everything revolves around why they can't do something or how the world is against them, they are draining. They will suck the life out of you if you're not carful. They will always see the worst in things and not the silver lining. You need to seriously question if this is worth your time!
Now it's time to align your crew! I hope you have lots from the first list that you can be so grateful for and tell them how happy you are to have them in your life! If you don't start positioning yourself in life so you attract these people. Are you helping others, supporting them in their dreams and visions? You need to be in order for these people to enter your life, we attract what we put out, so start being the best version of you, personal development should be on everyones agenda.
Cheers! Ebony
We have officially stepped into the last month of the year, how is that possible? eeeeek! What a great time to asses how you are ending your year, I see it in 2 ways, you are coasting through the last month or you are really looking to start January running by doing things in December that push you in a direction you want for the new year. I use to be the person that would coast through December and say oh when January comes I'm going to do... Don't get me wrong there is nothing wrong with that, I just think there is a stronger more efficient way to do the things. Success in any area loves momentum, so by doing activities or steps now jump starts your momentum for the coming year.
So you're probably thinking, what things? Well this depends on you, what are you working towards, do you have goals for the future, a direction you want to head, a project you want to do? Us Mom's have the world at our fingertips, we are all masters at something, even if you can't see it through the fog. So maybe that is your first step, to start figuring out what is truly calling you, setting up specific time to make a plan for your future and what you want. I have always been that person that looks for opportunity in everything, even the smallest passions, I alway knew I didn't want to end up doing something that I didn't like I want to do something unique and interesting, on my own time. Maybe you aren't ready for that kind of focus, maybe you looking for something more in the areas of health, hobbies, personal development, there are many areas that make up a happy mom, so pick one and get started before January.
We as moms need to be filling our cups, I talk about it all the time, how can we happily and excitedly give to our families if we aren't taking care of US. If we don't have excitement and passion in our own life around things outside of our families it's going to be very hard to withstand the challenges of mom hood when times get tough. If we have that core foundation of passions, creative escapes, things we can dive into to build our confidence, we then have tools to help us cope properly when life hits us.
If this isn't a spot you are currently in, and you are thinking I don't even know where to start, pop over to my FB Group Happy & Thriving Moms this is a great starting point, you will find a group of like minded women. It's also the home of the 5am Club, that is where I have changed my life, it's a dedicated time in my day that I only focus on me and where I want to be in my life and the passions that fuel my excitement. We as moms are still able to make our wildest dreams come true, it's just about knowing how to get started.
xx Ebony
Balance is a never ending journey for me, some weeks I feel I have it all figured out, others I'm and all or nothing girl. This week I'm struggling with balance, I have a project with a deadline and I feel the need to just put all my time into it. It's a creative project so it is completely my jam but I'm letting so many other things drop, so today I stop, pause, reorganize myself, get tough with myself and install balance back in my life.
I know I'm not the only one that has a constant struggle with balance right? Being aware of your struggle is huge, you are then aware of your weak spots and it is so much easier to move ahead in the right direction. Balance makes life flow so much better, you are less hard on yourself because you feel like you are contributing in all the areas that are important to you. You are much more likely to be less stressed and feel more motivated for everyday things. Let's take a look at 5 things that you need to recognize so you can achieve balance.
1. Define balance for yourself, your balance is not going to look like my balance, so spell it out folks. Make a list of the important things you want to regularly include in your life that will keep you excited, healthy, fulfilled and happy, this is your foundation.
2. Practising self discipline, oh this is a biggie, we can know where we want to be but unless we stick to the plan and hold ourselves to the things we need to do, we will be off track in no time. This can lead to procrastinate, overthink things and then in the end nothing happens, we haven't moved forward, we are still struggling. I have been guilty of this more than once, you get excited for the plan and a few weeks in the wind comes out of your sails. Good news you can always gather yourself and start again with a stronger motivation and more self discipline.
3. You aren't being consistent with your actions. Again this is huge, you have to take the steps each day that will get you where you want to be. Wanting and doing are different, you can't want your way to success, you must put in the work, consistently every single day.
4. You don't plan ahead. Once you have your game plan you have to have it wrote down, you need a map to follow to any destination. So with balance you most likely need to schedule things in that you want to do, flying by the seat of your pants here is too risky and is not going to help you get where you want to be.
5. You aren't taking proper care of yourself. Self Care! Giving yourself permission to rest, exercise, finding something that fuels your soul. You need to be consistently making time for yourself to do these things, guilt free.
I started thinking about all these areas and where my weak spots are and my lightbulb went off. I have all the tools I need, I'm just not utilizing them efficiently.
Overthinking! Yup that's me. In almost all my adventures, projects, commitments I find myself overthinking, which always leads to me getting it done at the last minute. So what is it, well did you know that in many cases overthinking is caused by a single emotion? ahhhh what? Really? Tell me!
FEAR...
I can see this, my hesitations are usually fear based, I second guess myself, sometimes jump to worse case scenarios, all the things.
Then I came across this and it blew my MIND.
Fear & Excitement are the exact same feeling. Mind Blown! Yes! If you sit down and think of a specific scenario of when you totally overthought a task and can feel the feeling of fear in that task, then you think of when you did it and how glad you were to do it, the excitement that came along with it, it feels the same!!! The thought are different but the feelings are the same.
This right here is life changing for me. I have steps I put in place to help me push past the overthinking:
1. Write all the steps I need to take on paper, it's my road map so I don't get overwhelmed and feed the overthinking (fear)
2. Set a hard deadline so I come to a point I can't put it off any longer
3. Get outside fresh air time right before I hit task, it clears my mind and gets me out of my head, I hold myself to when I'm done at a certain time outside, I do it! Gardening is my therapy so that's the outside task I usually pull my mind and emotion clearing from.
4. Oil up, if you know me I do a lot of work with essential oils, I have a saying whatever your problem, I have an oil for that! hahaha. In all seriousness essential oils are amazing for emotional support, relaxation, grounding, all the things over thinkers suffer from.
Now along with my steps and the conscious knowledge of the Fear and Emotion feeling I see myself totally overcoming my regular overthinking, it is defiantly a massive personal growth goal. I know it has led me to missed opportunities, idea paralysis, stress, and professional delays.
Now along with my steps and the conscious knowledge of the Fear and Emotion feeling I see myself totally overcoming my regular overthinking, it is defiantly a massive personal growth goal. I know it has led me to missed opportunities, idea paralysis, stress, and professional delays.
We all have room for growth in our lives, it's important to identify those areas but don't criticize yourself, just get the tools you need to work on it and be darn proud of yourself for doing so. There are so many people out there that aren't open to Mindset and personal development growth, in my opinion actions in these areas of your life will set you apart from the crowd.
Cheers & I vote your victory in it all!
It seems I am always making time for things that spark my excitement, passions and are just darn important to me, and you know what I'm so much happier because of it! For many years I just tried to fit things in here and there when I got a minute and I found myself always looking ahead hoping for the day to end so I could have a couple minutes to do something for myself. Not a great way to savour the years, be content or be truly happy. Life goes fast enough I realized I didn't need to start wishing the days away or depriving myself of the things I wanted to do.
I've also gotten better at scheduling all the things in, literally writing them down in my agenda so I have a reminder and list to keep me on track. I've found a little more joy in exercise, I'm working on it, the creative things I want to do are easy for me to make time for, the exercise just had to be put in there, heck because I want to live a long healthy life.
Projects can drag on through the days if you don't approach them in 2 parts, part one is the planning stage, this can make or break how efficient you are in the time it takes to do the project, I've mastered this over the years, I use my 5am hour that I have peace and quiet to design, plan, research whatever the project requires, this cuts so much time off the actual doing of the project. It allows me to just start the actual project when the time comes, no walking in circles, thinking about it, just bam, hitting the ground running.
Gawd I love my 5am hour that I get that peace and quiet before the kids wake up, it's such a mentally recharging time for me. I can prepare my brain for the marathon of the day, I can exercise my brain with creativity such as project prep if I choose, sometimes I socially fulfill myself with an early morning chat, the common thing is, it's only things that recharge my soul. There is no better way to start the day off with the right vibe than fulfilling your needs, as I like to always say, filling your cup first!
If you haven't tried waking up before the kids pop over to my group Happy & Thriving Moms where we chat everything 5am Club, there is even a 5am Club challenge under the Guides section to get you started on your journey of getting up before the kids!
I encourage you to start planning your time for yourself don't just leave it up to luck or chance that it just happens, you deserve to spend time on yourself every darn day.
Cheers
Ebony
